More devilish definitions from Ambrose Bierce (note: I hope all my readers understand I am being ironic referring to the devil; it is just meant as the notion of things defined, sometimes humorously, as contrary to literalism, received wisdom, and sincerity):
“Optimist, n. A proponent of the doctrine that black is white. A pessimist applied to God for relief. “Ah, you wish to restore your hope and cheerfulness,” said God. ‘No,’ replied the petitioner, ‘I wish you to create something that would justify them.’ ‘The world is all created,’ said God, ‘but you have overlooked something–the mortality of the optimist.'”
Thoughts: this entry deals with hope, futility, and mortality. My Mom told me when I was having a difficult time as a late-adolescent: “life is a gift.” Yes, every day is a blessing.
“Oratory, n. A conspiracy between speech and action to the understanding. A tyranny tempered by stenography.”
Thoughts: this entry deals with hollow and deceptive rhetoric many associate with public officials. Reporters of what is being said can moderate, regulate, and question official pronouncements. See George Orwell’s “Politics and the English Language.”
“Ordinary, n. Common; customary. In the Southwestern States of the Union this word is pronounced ornery and means ugly–a striking testimony to the prevalence of the disagreeable.”
Thought: as mentioned in a past blog, Bierce was a military hero who had a tragic family life. So his cynicism is understandable.
“Orthodox, n. An ox wearing the popular religious yoke.”
Thoughts: I am a non-devout Catholic who has had experience with devout and conservative ones, so I sympathize with this definition. It is ironic that some of the most homicidal people in history have identified as deeply religious: the 9/11 terrorists, John Lennon’s murderer, abortion-doctor murderers. In some ways Karl Marx was right that religion can be “the opiate of the masses.”