“Stalker 1,2,3” by yours truly
“Despite what you’ve heard, I am not a stalker.”
“That is fine. This is B—.”
“Nice to meet you Booby! Try to friendly.”
“That’s okay.”
“I’ll go away.”
“Stalker 2” by yours truly
“It’s me again. Never mind.”
“Are you in your right mind?”
“Right. Mind?”
“Stalker 3” by yours truly
“Are you okay?”
“Yes, as your upstairs neighbor, I can say ‘Daddy cares.’ And don’t date bears.”
“What? Are these poems for children from broken homes?”
“That judgment is yours.”
“Ohh!”
“I don’t date whores, and am firmly opposed to it.”